What Pakistan meant to me … What it means now
Nidhi Shendurnikar Tere on the
transformation that happened through research
As a nationalist, patriotic and proud
Indian; Pakistan hardly figured in my list of concerns a few years ago. I
neither despised it, nor was curious about it. The only time I thought about
Pakistan was during an India-Pakistan confrontation on the cricket field. I
rooted for the Indian cricket team, prayed for its victory (even paid visits to
the nearby temple) and suffered dejection in the case of an Indian loss against
Pakistan. To me, at that point of time, nothing was more humiliating than India
losing in a cricket match against Pakistan (a victory of course meant
jubilation!). Having thought of Pakistan as an arch enemy, cricket was nothing
less than war and losing to Pakistan unacceptable to me and others of my age. The
only other reference to Pakistan was through news about bomb blasts and terror
attacks in India which left me perplexed as I began associating Pakistan with
terrorism, chaos, anarchy and everything that was anti-India. Too naïve to
explore anything beyond the mainstream discourse, my idea of Pakistan remained
limited and heavily skewed.
Come 2011 and it changed. The
change though was a gradual process even without my knowing. I was set for a
PhD in Political Science and was mulling over my topic of research. Post many
brainstorming sessions with my to be supervisor, we decided to work on an issue
related to South Asia (which is also his area of specialization). This is how I
started working on India-Pakistan relations and the Media’s role. Initially, though
I remained skeptical about the entire project. Researching on India-Pakistan
was not easy, it was considered to be controversial and even my parents were left
wondering about my choice of topic. To this day, a mention of India-Pakistan
manages to raise eyebrows; some question the utility of carrying out such a
research, some advise caution, some consider me brave, some express outright
displeasure and some others remain unperturbed.
Soon enough the nitty gritties of
the research process required me to undertake a thorough study of the
confrontational past of the relationship. I also realized that without
interacting with Pakistanis my research could turn out to be one-sided and of
no consequence. My quest for the archives of Pakistani newspapers took me to
Delhi and Chandigarh and I began looking for Pakistani people who could help me
in the process. I first chanced upon Rehman
Ilyas (Founder - Romancing the Border), interacted with him and ended up
contributing a piece on Indo-Pak friendship as a testimonial ('Let us be friends who respect each other's
differences’, 2012). Not aware that this was the beginning of a
transformative journey, I befriended many Pakistanis on Facebook and networked
with them. This opened a new window frame for me. The interactions swelled,
friendships developed and these positively affected my attitudes and
perceptions of Pakistan. I realized there was much more to Pakistan – a side undiscovered
and ignored by the popular political and media discourse in my country.
The Pakistan that I had not known
was introduced to me to by my Pakistani friends. A Pakistan with breath-taking natural
landscapes, a Pakistan where people lived with dreams and aspirations similar
to that of Indians, a Pakistan with striking resemblances in culture, food,
festivals, music; a Pakistan whose young citizens valued education, progress,
development as much as Indians do; a Pakistan where citizens condemned
violence, terrorism as much as Indians did and a Pakistan that did not hate
India but looked up to the values upholded by Indian democracy and secularism. It
was indeed a different Pakistan that I discovered through a string of
interactions where I found Pakistanis to be warm, caring, reciprocative and more
than willing to discuss various issues related to my research. As I began
writing more and more on Indo-Pak issues, I discovered many peace-building
groups on social media (Aman ki Asha, Aaghaz-e-Dosti,
Romancing the Border, Friendships Across Borders: Aao Dosti Karein) and in
the beginning of this year got selected for a yearlong Peace building
initiative (Building Peace Project 2014-15 by The Red Elephant Foundation).
Much has changed in the span of three
and a half years of this research – a deep intellectual engagement with people
from across the border made this possible. So far I had heard tales of
friendships narrated by my teachers with friends in Pakistan. Now I have my own
stories to tell. A perspective that was amiss earlier was gifted to me through
the process of research. This year may witness the culmination of my research
(hopefully); however the process, the journey and the friendships will stay on
forever. I have always believed in the transformative and healing power of
research – that as a researcher one has to successfully imbibe within oneself. The short term goal of engaging in a research project
is to derive conclusions by seeking answers to certain questions; the long term
goal however is to offer a more holistic and comprehensive perspective. A life
changing vision is what this research has left me with. At this point of time, it feels difficult to
describe and explain what I encountered within the boundaries of terms like ‘methods’,
‘hypothesis’, ‘conclusions’. To confine it within the boundary of a 250 page
thesis is certainly a task that I feel less prepared for. Can friendships be ever
bounded into page limits, chapters and conclusions? Today, I strongly believe and
wish to reinforce that I cannot let love for my own nation be construed, limited
and narrowly bracketed into hatred and antagonism for the ‘other’. It is research
that brought me to peace-building and I hope to stay ingrained in it forever.
The author is a Political Science doctoral candidate at The Maharaja
Sayajirao University of Baroda, Gujarat, and a research fellow of the
University Grants Commission working on India-Pakistan Conflict Mediation and
Role of Media. She firmly believes in and endorses the power of research to
positively transform hardened, stereotypical and nationalistic attitudes.